Political Frenzy

That sexxxy ultra-conservative vixen Ann Coulter is at it again! She preaches abstinence, and then makes it so hard.

Pun intended.

Her article, “Let’s Make America a ‘Sad-Free Zone’!” gets under my skin.

First of all, she can’t get her own religion right. “But since Adam ate the apple and let evil into the world, deranged individuals have existed,” she confidently asserts. In fact, Genesis 2:16-17 says: ” Yahweh God commanded the man, saying, ‘From every tree of the garden you may freely eat, but from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat. For the day that you eat from it you will surely die.’” He didn’t let evil in to the world, he simply became aware of it. I’m not even a Christian and I know that.

Then she says: “It’s certainly not against the law to be an unsociable loner. If it were, Ralph Nader would be behind bars right now, where he belongs.” Look, I’m not about to cast my ballot for Nader, but I like having seat belts, airbags, and a working swing axle in my car. Nader hasn’t hurt anyone, he’s saved lives. Why behind bars, Coulter? Pandering the rabble again?

To the meat of the story. The Playboy Pundit (which is her nickname as of now) is supporting the notion that more concealed weapons will equate to more safety. The figures prove her right! Many massacres have been avoided by having a would-be victim armed and firing back, stopping the attacker before they caused any more carnage. This is an indisputable fact that lefties conveniently ignore.

“Needless to say, Virginia Tech is a Gun-Free School Zone” she says. Well, no. Not so needless to say after a Virginia Tech student was caught carrying a licensed pistol onto the campus and right into class a while back. They had to debate whether or not discipline the student. Virginia Tech is no a zero-tolerance environment, so that argument falls flat.

But before we turn America into Sigma Iotia II, there’s something else that needs to be addressed. Coulter is subscribing to the logical theory “A or B; if not A then B”. This bypasses, however, the possibility of compromise, or even of a “C” option.

There are people allowed to carry firearms on campus - Campus Police. These people SHOULD have been there. Their absence is what allowed this tragedy to continue. Armed, licensed, responsible people should have been available to stop the shooter dead in his tracks - literally. We have an armed response force for these situations, they just need to be used. I assure you more killers have been stopped by this nation’s brave police forces than by vigilantes.

“Bowling for Columbine”, a rambling documentary by Michael Moore (who points out a lot of figures and sad anecdotes, but never really seems to offer any kind of solution) does provide an interesting question. Other nations such as Germany, Australia, the UK, Canada, or Japan don’t have these kinds of massacres - certainly not at the alarming frequency the United States seems to have them. It’s not a matter of gun control, everyone and his brother in the Outback has a rifle for shooting snakes. It’s not a matter of our movies or video games. Anyone who’s seen “Ichi the Killer” or played “Virtua Fighter IV” knows that the Japanese have a total boner for gore. So why is it?

It’s something deeper, something cultural. Something about the United States drives many people over the edge. I’m not sure, but I think I know why. But no legislation will solve this problem.

There is a growing self-destructive aura on our nation. I sense in my classmates at Seattle Central Community College a deep detachment from power of God in themselves, an aimless wandering, running from the lows and searching for the next high. And absurd as it may seem, it’s linked to our obsession with American Idol. Instead of striving for moral and personal achievement, we’re constantly seeking the applause of our “peers”.

From Columbine to Virginia Tech, these students have been ostracized from society from an early age, instead of being welcomed in the arms of their classmates and their communities. Our society is an exclusive society that makes outcasts out of the weird, the strange, and the abnormal. Goth, transgendered, Islamic, and booger-eating kids all deserve our love and acceptance.

Guns don’t kill people. People kill people. And societies that crush our souls create killers.

Directed by an ad on my own site, I came upon a little niche of the internet known as “HumanEvents.com”, which boldly proclaimed “Leading the Conservative Movement since 1944″. Wow. That’s an old website.

I was given an offer I couldn’t refuse. Allow myself to be addressed as “Fellow Conservative”, and get an email with a PDF file that regales all the dirty secrets of the baby-eating maniac who is Barack Obama. Color me excited!

It’s quite a hefty little packet, with 17 authors filling 32 pages. The author of the second piece is the esteemed Ms Ann Coulter, whose rage against Hollywood is tempered by her dating of many many celebrities (kept those legs shaved for the Spin Magazine Editor, huh Ms Holier-Than-Thou?). Honestly, Republicans are entranced by the fact that skirts always seem two inches away from pulling a Brittney Spears (click on this article’s picture, I swear to you you can look up her damn dress IN A JPEG). Apparently Democrats don’t mind because they’re all gay. I guess.

Ms Coulter’s article had me gasping at her audacity. The PDF warned me I was not allowed to copy or quote without written consent (no way can I get written consent) so I suggest you download it yourself: http://www.humanevents.com/offers/offer.php?id=BHO201

She makes reference to things I have never heard of, apparently movements or political groups that, quite frankly, don’t exist. She says that Obama attacked people who are pro-smallness in politics. But as far as my research indicates, that is a phrase Obama himself coined. Perhaps she is making reference to the “small government” advocates? In which case her fear is misplaced, because contextually it becomes obvious that Obama meant a narrow focus of issues and a small worldview, not a small government.

Coulter also talks about how Obama takes a stand against anti-hope. Well, if you google the term, the first three results are from a LiveJournal user whose handle is AntiHope.

She then goes racist! First she feeds on America’s basest fears like a succubus by only referring to Barack as B. Hussein Obama. Yea, way to emphasize his middle name. Good to see someone finally recognized that all terrorists and America-haters are made that way by what their parents put on their birth certificate.

And in a totally abhorrent move, she suggests that Obama hire Jesse Jackson as a speech writer to help him rhyme. Why? Because he’s black? I mean, that is totally from left field. It came out of left-field, beaned the first baseman in the head, stopped in mid air to tell racist jokes to the coach, turned around, bounced up and down three times on Reggie Jackson’s grave, and then exploded.

Meanwhile, I urge Ann Coulter to go back to the Playboy Mansion where she really belongs.